Perspective

Its's amazing how life just gets put into perspective
What a rollercoaster the last 6 months have been...
I am staring at this page
wondering just how to put it down into words...
Today was really the first time in so long
that I felt I was standing on steady ground
I have been floundering for so long
that I started thinking that it was 'normal'
Like a duck...
Paddling frantically under the surface
in order to keep going, keep moving, keep floating
Whilst trying to keep calm above the surface.

So yes
Life got put into perspective in the last 6 months
Algamdulillah
I think I have grown up in so many ways
more in the last few months than ever before
I say thank you to the Almighty
I see now what an important time of self-development and self-growth
that I have been through.
Intense training almost.

I have learnt so much about expectations
about change
about dealing with emotions
about relationships...
those that are good for you
and those that are not good for you at a certain time.

With all that has happened this year
I have become so much more aware about what is really important in life
(well to me at least)
and what is just not an issue / unnecessary
Dont assume anything... everrrr
The Almighty's plan is so immense
and sooo beyond our realm of possibility
that we cannot really comprehend
the full extent of even the tiniest part of it.

What an emotional rollercoaster the last 6 months have been.
Physically too.
All I can say is shukr, thank you to the Almighty
for getting me through it all in one piece.
I actually cant believe it.
The power of prayer has been a light at the end of the tunnel for me
Algamdulillah!

For so long
I couldnt really deal with alllllll that was going on
To me
in me
around me
with me
Everything was just too much
I didnt know how to even verbalise my
thoughts, fears, emotions
Nevermind to write them down.
But I first managed the unsaid
from the heart and soul
Which gave me the courage and ability
to give the said
To verbalise
and now to start writing it down
Algamdulillah.

Steady underfoot is what I feel like today
Inshallah it will continue tomorrow
But Algamdulillah.

Calmness
moderate
serenity
peace
gratitude

R
1/7/2011